Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
