Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I want to be your penis for a week.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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