can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Randomize
