You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I met the friendliest cop last night
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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