Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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