Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize