youre lurking in front of me
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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