so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
You brought string cheese to the strip club
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
