Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
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