she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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