let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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