is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I need to calm my uterus...
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
