I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Drake has all the answers
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
