I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
