Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize