sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
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