Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
