He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Randomize
