worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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