I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
