I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
