So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
there is another microwave in the elevator.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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