i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
