No, drunk sperm still make babies.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
