you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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