Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
