I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
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