i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
