I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
