Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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