I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
they call him Oral-B. enough said
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
