ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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