i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
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