Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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