Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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