tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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