so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
