so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
