I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
