So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
