Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize