I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Sorry about my life...
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
