i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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