I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
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