They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
