I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
