The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
