My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
