READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
