there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Randomize
