we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I am mentally ready for anal.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
